Posts Tagged ‘East Coast Swing’

I want to continue our discussion on personal improvement.  We all now know why our shoes stink.  But there are other concerns that still keep us socially awkward at swing parties and ballroom dances.

You know me, I’m a stickler for dance etiquette.  I don’t need to be the best East Coast Swing dancer in the room.  But when I dance with someone, I do have a goal.  It’s not to out dance my partner or show everyone how cool I am.  My goal is for my partner to end the dance with a smile on their face and thinking, “I really enjoyed that.  Swing dancing with her is fun.”  Mind you,  I have the same expectation for my dance partner.  I want to end the dance smiling after enjoying dancing with them too.

But every so often, you dance with a “Sketchy Guy” or a “Sketchy Girl”.  After dancing with a sketchy dancer, it can be very hard to walk away with a smile on your face.  Many times, it is hard to enjoy dancing with a sketchy dancer.

 We have all been guilty of the behaviors bellow.  We have all done things that can be thought of as “sketchy”.  But what we need to do, is recognize our sketchiness, laugh at it, learn from it and then stop doing it.  Nobody wants to be described as “You know, that sketchy swing dancer, over there.”

Please enjoy the musings of Richard Powers.  Richard has been teaching contemporary and historic social dance for over thirty years.  He leads workshops around the world and is currently a full-time instructor at Stanford University’s Dance Division.

“This is a touchy topic because I don’t want to speak dismissively of anyone who loves to dance.  However it’s an important topic to many women who complain about “sketchy guys” at dances, so that makes it worth discussing.

What is a sketchy guy?

“OK, that’s a sexist term.  So let’s say that any woman who acts this way is a “sketchy girl.”  But somehow we see more males than females behaving this way on the dance floor.

A sketchy guy is…

1) Any man who is physically rough with his partner, who hauls his partner though steps and figures.

As you already know… a good lead knows and cares what is comfortable for his partner.  He cares what is pleasurable or fun for her, as opposed to just showing off, or using her as an accessory to his ego.

A considerate man dances for his partner’s ability and comfort; sketchy guys don’t.

A good lead clearly suggests an option, which is different from controlling her.  He proposes, not prescribes, a certain way of moving to his partner.  If his partner does not go with his proposal (does not ‘follow’), he adapts to her motion instead of exerting more power to press her to accept the proposal.

But guys, don’t be so afraid of seeming sketchy that your leads become wimpy.  Leads are physical, and your partner depends on clear leads.  If the physicality of the lead/follow connection is on a scale of one-to-ten, avoid 0 and 1 (wimpy); avoid 9 and 10 (physically rough).

2) A man who corrects his partner.

Have you ever danced with one of these guys?  Often the first thing he does when he begins a dance is correct his partner!  “You’re doing it wrong. You have to do it this way.”  Yikes!

The clear message to most women is that he’s doing this to exert absolute control at the beginning of their dance.  It’s his way of establishing dominance, saying in effect, “This is NOT a conversation and you don’t have a voice when dancing with me, so shut up and do as you’re told.”

To be fair, this may not be his actual intent.  Maybe his teacher gave him the misguided impression that he should correct his partners if they dance differently from the Only One Way he knows.  But regardless of his intent, a correcting attitude feels disrespectful to her, so men be forwarned that she may not want to dance with you again.

A correcting attitude is usually either  (A) antisocially pedantic  or  (B) it demonstrates his inexperience, showing her that he only knows one way to dance (or only one style, or one kind of dance hold/frame).  If he thinks, “Oh I know other ways, but I think they’re all wrong,” then he’s the first version, antisocially pedantic.

An only-one-way attitude is also unrealistic.  How can anyone not understand that dancers come in different shapes, sizes and experience?  Each partner has had different teachers.  Or maybe they just picked up dancing on the fly, by diving in and seeing what works.  Different doesn’t mean wrong.  When someone has a different style from your own, try to find ways to make dancing functional, fun and social.

Women aren’t exempt from this consideration.  When a woman exhibits a correcting attitude, it’s just as bad as when a man does it.

Exceptions:  Correcting is okay of it’s to let one’s partner know if they’re hurting you, “driving dangerously” on the dance floor, or if your partner actually asks you for advice or feedback.  Some dancers do request feedback and help from their partners, so if your partner requests feedback, then yes, it’s fine and even appreciated.

3) A man who tries to pick up a woman on the dance floor.

It’s smart to assume that women come to a dance to dance, not to find a date.  If there’s an exception, she’ll find a way to let you know, but the default assumption is that she came to have fun dancing. 

    a) Don’t ask her for a date (unless she initiates or hints at it).
    b) Don’t ask the same woman for several dances unless she lets you know she wants more dances with you.
    c) If she says no to a dance, then no means no.  Period.  Don’t pester her.

Some scenes may be exceptions to this.  Some salseros have told me that their salsa club is essentially a pick-up club, and that everyone going there knows this.  OK, if that’s the understanding at a dance, fine.  But the inviolable part of this section is: if she says no, respect her wishes and don’t pester her.

4) Stinky guys (and women).

It’s amazing that some people haven’t learned the essential social skill of hygiene.  Always shower, brush your teeth, floss and use deodorant before going out dancing, including to dance classes.  And if you tend to get really sweaty, you get huge bonus points for bringing a second dry shirt to change into halfway through the dance.

Women, please don’t wear perfumes (or colognes for men) to a social dance.  Most people don’t consider it very sociable, and some have allergies to fragrances.

“Sketchy” isn’t a textbook definition, so opinions about the term vary.  Some people consider stinky dancers sketchy, while others say, “No, it’s not sketchy, it’s just disgusting.”  OK, but either way it’s not a good thing.

Who isn’t a sketchy guy?

1) My pet peeve is a few undergrad students who call a grad student “sketchy” simply because he’s a few years older.  No, being a different age doesn’t make someone sketchy, especially if he’s a good dancer and an attentive, respectful partner.

2) A man or woman with “emerging social skills” isn’t necessarily sketchy.  Everyone has to learn somewhere.  If you don’t know how to respond to someone’s social awkwardness, err on the side of patience and encouragement.  They will appreciate your kindness more than you realize!

Bottom line:

In an age of increasing divisiveness, we should try to be more tolerant and accepting of differences of any kind.  But roughness, disrespect and predatory behavior is sketchy, and isn’t welcome at a social dance.”

Excerpt from “Sketchy Guys” Musing by Richard Powers
http://socialdance.stanford.edu/syllabi/sketchy.htm

How to avoid being “Sketchy”

First, we must quickly define communication.  Communication isn’t just sending a message.  True communication happens when a message is sent, received, interpreted and responded to.  In order to communicate with someone, you must also be connected to them, otherwise, they never receive your message.  One can see how dancing is often the result of good communication between partners.  He communicates through his lead… she has to receive the message, interpret it and chooses how to respond. Then she sends her own communication back as following.  He receives the communication, interprets it, and adjusts his lead for the next communication… and the cycle repeats over and over until the song ends. 

Many times, sketchiness comes from a lack of communication.  Rough leads and rough follows may be the result of one-way communication.  Think of excessivly aggressive leading and back leading as shouting at a partner.  When was the last time you were shouted at and you enjoyed it?  Leaders and followers that are sketchy are shouting at their partners the entire dance.  Their message is ”I don’t trust you to know what you are doing,” or “I’m taking over from here!”  They have taken the away the two-way communication of a dance partnership and taken a lot of the joy out of dancing for themselves and their partners.

What can we do to communicate better?

ZeDiamond Dance Method is a unique was to learn and teach dance.  Lots of dancers worry about their feet, the counts of the music and being wrong or their partner being wrong.  Many dancers play the blame game with their partners and leave the dance floor feeling guilty.  ZeDiamond Dance Method takes that all away.  It is way to learn how to dance where making mistakes and falling out of time makes you a better dancer. 

Many dancers concentrate on learning steps and moves.  With ZeDiamond Dance Method, the focus is on feeling the rhythm of the music and connecting with your partner.  As your mind let’s go, your body relaxes and you start to dance without thinking.  You feel the dance.  You feel your partner.  And the steps just flow through you.  With ZeDiamond Dance Method Learn the East Coast Swing, you will learn to connect with your partner, communicate with your partner through leading and following and enjoy dancing with one another.  Click here to learn how ZeDiamond Dance Method is different from traditional ways of teaching swing dancing.

You will truly see how dancing is two-way communication between partner with ZeDiamond Dance Method.  Start dancing now by ordering your own 2 DVD set of ZeDiamond Dance Method Learn the East Coast Swing.

See you out on dance floor,

Amy Barnes

ZeDiamond Dance Method

 

 

What we love about East Coast Swing…

Once you start swing dancing, it’s hard to stop.  The people are friendly.  The music is lively.  Your partner sweeps you off your feet.  You are having a ball!  Click here to see how much fun East Coast Swing dancing can be.  You are tearing up the dance floor and working up a sweat as you dance the night away.

Many beginner dancers are surprised by how athletic a night of dancing can be.  Even if you dance along to an intructional DVD at home, like ZeDiamond Dance Method Learn the East Coast Swing, your body will start to get warm and sweat.  Sweat is how your body cools down.  Sweat can be a hard thing to control out on the dance floor.  So let’s cover a few basics that will keep you out on the dance floor swing dancing all night long, while keeping you fresh as a flower.  Today’s focus will be stinky shoes.

Funky Feet

There are more sweat glands on your feet than anywhere else on your body.  These sweat glands kick in to action while we are dancing because they are trying to cool us down.  Normally the sweat would dry up, we would cool down and the bacteria on our skin would begin dying off.  Out on the dance floor, our swing shoes keep our feet moist and the bacteria keep partying.  In many cases, it is the bacteria that cause our feet and shoes to stink – not just the sweat on it’s own.

Why are my favorite swing shoes the stinkiest?

As much as I love to have new shoes… my favorites are always old shoes.  They are broken-in just right.  They have stretched to fit my foot perfectly.  I know just how much grip and slip to expect from the suede soles.  But these little shoes can clear a room in a heart beat if they aren’t taken care of.  Dance shoes stink because they have had many hours on the dance floor, collecting sweat and bacteria from feet.   After hours of dancing East Coast Swing, dance shoes are warm, wet and full of stinky bacteria.

Tips to De-Stink your dance shoes

• Air them out – It is very tempting to keep stinky shoes in a plastic bag to trap the smell.  You also trap in the bacteria and the warm and wet world they love to live in.  Once out of the range of the public nose, exposure to cool, dry air will help keep the life of bacteria down.  Porches, garages, basements and mud rooms are popular places for stinky shoes.  But keep them close to a de-humidifier or air purifier for best results.  Store dance shoes in a breathable cloth or mesh bags instead of plastic to help keep them dry.
• Wear 2 or 3 pairs of shoes - If you dance multiple days in a row, your shoes are not getting much of a chance to recover.  If your shoes do not completely dry between dance sessions, the bacteria is not dying off and will contiune to stink up your shoes.  Rotating shoes will give them more time to dry and more time for bacteria to die.  For a 2 shoe rotation think, “a pair to wear and a pair to rest.”  This gives your shoes atleast 24 hours to dry and recover.   If a full day is not enough, or you have a long day and night of dancing ahead of you, try a 3 shoe rotation.  “Wear a pair today, a fresh pair for tonight and a third pair to rest and be ready for tomorrow.”  
• Wear clean and dry socks – Wearing and changing socks is a quick and easy way to control the moisture on your feet and in your shoes.  Look for socks that wick moisture away from your feet or are made with cotton.  If you think you can smell your own shoes or you can feel that your feet are wet, a quick change of socks may keep the smell at bay.  In many cases, it is easier to wash sock than shoes.  Make sure you are always wearing a fresh and clean pair of socks… not a worn, damp or stinky pair of socks from the bottom of your shoe bag. 
• Foot powders, sprays and drops – If they work on your feet, they may work on your shoes too.  Spray or dust with powder before and after dancing.  This will help to control the moisture level and deoderize your shoes.  Tea tree oil drops will also help control fungus and bacterial growth as well as help shoes smell fresh. 
• Sneaker Balls and Dryer Sheets- These little guys are like “Stick Ups Air Fresheners” for shoes.  For about $5, you get 2 Sneaker Balls that fit easily inside your shoes, shoe bag or any other small space.  Though they don’t do anything to help dry out your shoes, Sneaker Balls will help to deoderize your stinky toe tappers once you take them off.  You can try making something similar at home.  Stuff the toe of an old sock or knee high with baking soda and add a few drops of tee tree oil.  Tie off the toe of the sock to make a ball and trim off the rest of the sock.  The baking soda will help to absorb odors and the tee tree oil keeps things smelling fresh.  Slipping a fresh dryer sheet inside your shoes may also help to deodorize them when you are not wearing them.

What can I do at home?

Many people practice dancing at home.  My husband and I can be found dancing in our kitchen from time to time.  But rather than busting out the stinky dance shoes, we have more of a sock-hop approach to dancing at home.  Keeping your feet out of your shoes will also help with the smell.  Walking around barefoot helps to keep you feet cool and dry.  It also limits the bacteria growth.  Less bacteria = less stink.

When learning to dance at home, you have the opportunity to review your technique and improve your skills.  Some like to follow along with an instructional dance DVD.  ZeDiamond Dance Method Learn the East Coast Swing is a 2 DVD set that breaks down the basics of East Coast Swing dancing in a unique way.  Dancing along with a partner, practicing ZeDiamond Dance Method, will not only help reinforce fundamentals of East Coast Swing dancing, but you will be improving your conection skills with your partner and feeling the rhythm of the music at the same time.  Click here to learn more about ZeDiamond Dance Method and its unique way of teaching dance.

On a night when you want to dance, but there is no ballroom dance or swing party to go to, slip in your ZeDiamond Dance Method DVD and sock-hop or barefoot dance in the comfort of your own home.  Near the end of the DVD 2, there is practice music you can dance along with at home.  Leave the stinky shoes to air-out another night.

See you out on the dance floor,

Amy Barnes

ZeDiamond Dance Method

THE STAG LINE – Where the unattached cowboys hang out together talking, planning and spinning yarn.

“The stag line hangs out by the pool tables, the popcorn machine or the video games.  The stags tote long-necked beer bottles, lean against the posts, check out the ladies and pump up their courage to actually ask someone to dance.  These cowboys equate to bachelor moose in the forest who have yet to acquire a harem.

Types commonly found on the stag line include:

• Championship Dancers - Could have won every dance contest they ever saw; planning to enter one soon.
• Don Juans - Profess to have choice of any lady in the place; know (in a Biblical sense) or know someone who has been romantically involved with anyone you point out; waiting for the “right” lady to ask out; then waiting some more.
• Great Debaters – Will argue any side of any topic; can deliver colorful, impassioned and nearly-informed oration on important matters.
• Heavyweight Champs – Weigh over 250 pounds; sincerely pledge to defend anyone whose person or honor is in jeopardy; get wet eyes from even minor expressions of gratitude; fond of calling people, “little buddy”.
• Major Leaguers – Recount sports trivia expertly; willingly review their own heroic athletic achievements; can explain precisely how to pitch no-hitters, bowl 300 games and catch fifteen pound bass; considering the Iron Man competition.
• Millionaires-In-Training - Buy drinks for buddies until the bartender delivers a pot of coffee; listen to Zig Zigler tapes; have inside tips and hot ideas; work in insurance or investment sales; will be wealthy as soon as commissions multiply.
• Race Car Drivers - Relate exciting automotive exploits; have many tickets; insurance premiums reflect their prowess; do their own mechanical work; drive Camaros with primer spots, which means any Camaro, rather than pick-up trucks.
• SBDs (Silent But Deadly) - Can flatulate on cue, with or without the finger pull; able to control smell, sound and direction, they say; journeymen can toot a reasonable facsimile of “Three Blind Mice”.

Excerpt form “Paul McClure’s Country Dance Etiquette” by Paul McClure

Why is the Stag Line important?

To be honest, that all depends on you.  If you are looking for conversation about topics other than dancing, cruising the room for your next date, or you want to try to talk someone else into buying you a drink from the bar… then the stag line is for you.  The stag line is a collection of people who enjoy the atmosphere of the dance hall, but have other social agendas – a.k.a. not there to dance.  Many of the people on the stag line have never tried to learn how to dance or have only tried briefly and had a bad experience so they quit trying to learn. 

If you have come to the dance to DANCE, then you may wish to avoid the stag line.  The stag line may offer much entertainment to you if you are taking a break to rest your feet, but no amount attention you pay them will move them closer to the dance floor.

What’s a girl to do if her partner is really on the Stag Line?

Well, part of what keeps people on the stag line is fear… fear of the unknown, fear of trying something new, fear of failure and fear of looking unattractive in front of other people.  You may have noticed that many on the stag line consider themselves “experts” in their field.  They want to be the best at something – sports trivia, reckless driving, business, or just want to be the smartest person in the room.  Well, having to admit that you do not know how to dance and going through the growing pains of beginner dancers may just be too much for their egos to handle.

If someone on the stag line is ever going to make the transition to the dance floor, they will do it only if they feel that they are in a comfortable and no-threatening place.  The ballroom party, swing dance or night club may not be the best place to get started.  Learning to dance at home may be a more suitable venue to try out those first few dance steps.

A new and innovative way to learn to dance is with ZeDiamond Dance Method – Learn the East Coast Swing two DVD set.  This DVD set lays all the basics for learning to swing dance in the comfort of your own living room, kitchen or den.  This is great for the person who is too shy to learn to dance in front of other people.  You can even close your blinds and curtains so you neighbors don’t even see you dancing for the first time.

ZeDiamond Dance Method is also great for someone who has tried to learn to dance in the past, but gave up because they became frustrated.  The DVD’s  make it easy to learn to East Coast Swing Dance, because you can rewind them as many times as you like, play them as often as you need to and review what you have learned just before heading out the door to the next dance party. 

East Coast Swing is a great first dance to learn.  Swing is a very universally known dance and danced many places – country bars, ballroom dances, swing parties and night clubs all play music that is approprate for East Coast Swing dancing.  Once you have this dance under your belt, you will have many opportunities to show off your new found dance skills.

I hope to see you off the stag line and out on the dance floor,

Amy Barnes

ZeDiamond Dance Method

 

“The Sideline – Where folks cluster to eat, drink and be merry”

“The sideline encompasses dance hall territory where folks congregate to eat, drink and visit.  Although this turf includes dancers sitting out between dances, it also has its own special array of wildlife.

Many of these sideliners are evolving through the pre-dance phase of their development.  They are watching the dancers, observing the dress, learning the protocol and acclimating to the environment.  After a few visits and a period of observation, sideliners usually join the dance lessons.

Species you might find lurking on the sideline include:

• Cowboys – Choose to work on the look before moving to the dance, and got it right… have ready ripostes to avoid dancing should they actually get asked.
• Furballs – Conceal bald spot under an expensive hat; favor beards; wear flimsy, unbuttoned shirts; prefer shirt ripped off so their hair shoulders can be admired; ladies say they feel like warm loofahs.
• Groupies – Adore band members, or occasionally regular dancers, with obsessive intensity; rarely dance themselves; sit perfectly still staring at the band or dancers; nurse drinks.
• Lounge Lizards – Sport white shoes, assisted hair, polyester shirts and enough neck chains to compose a Mr. “T” starter kit; close personal friends with bartenders; surrounded by an alcoholic haze and cigarette smoke.
• Greenhorns- Read about dancing in the newspaper; sit alone looking dazed; suffering from a recent broken relationship… if you give them an advertising flyer about upcoming lessons, they will attend and never forget you.
• Stool Hounds – Get carded (asked for ID to prove they are of drinking age) by doorman; drink beer; wear baseball caps, T-shirts and tennis shoes; sit in groups, but very little conversation; learning the ropes of sociability; served free coffee by the end of the evening.
• Suits – In from out of town; on expense accounts; stay at airport hotels; arrive at the dance hall by taxi; remove coat and tie to look more country; may roll up shirtsleeves so French cuffs aren’t so apparent; hoping to get lucky; won’t.”

Excerpt from “Paul McClure’s Country Dance Etiquette” by Paul McClure

Why are the people on the sideline so important?

Because silly, we all used to be one. 

These are the people on the edge. 

They are the ”dying to dance, but hoping nobody will ask me,” people. 

Perhaps they want to dance, but they don’t know how. 

Maybe they are beginner dancers that just need a little confidence boost.  Sometimes it takes all their courage to get in the door and there is little courage left for the dance floor.

We have all been there.  The difference between the Sideliners and Regular Dancers are the amount of miles collected in trips around the dance floor. 

We all have to get started dancing somewhere… why not here?

Though it is hard for some beginner dancers to believe, nobody has been dancing since birth.  Not a single dancer got their start in the womb.  I’ll let you know if that happens, but for now… my baby has yet to “Boom A Boom” correctly in my belly. 

Many great social swing and ballroom dancers did not start dancing until they are adults.  Not long ago, they were Sideliners too.  But they found a way to learn how to dance, stuck with it and in time became the life of the party.

One way to help you get off the sideline and on to the dance floor is to learn at home with a “Learn how to dance” DVD.  With ZeDiamond Dance Method – Learn the East Coast Swing DVD’s, you could be up and dancing in less than 90 minutes.  Once you master the basics of rhythm, connection and a few simple dance moves in East Coast Swing, you will be out on that dance floor enjoying yourself, the music and your partner.  After that, their is no turning back.  You will have transformed from a Sideliner to a Regular Dancer and soon will be the envy of other Sideliners. 

 See you out on the dance floor,

Amy Barnes

ZeDiamond Dance Method

We all have different reasons to learn how to dance…

When I started dancing, I was a single college student.  I was stuck on campus taking summer school classes.   Unlike other students, I wanted to do something other than hang out in a smokey bar and drink away brain cells.  I wanted to make new friends.  I wanted to express myself.  I wanted to be a “regular” somewhere.  I wanted to know that I could just show up (without a date) and see people I knew, have a good time and still get up and go to class in the morning without a headache. 

What I never knew I always wanted, was to learn how to Swing Dance.  I have gotten everything I wanted and so much more from swing dancing.  It all started with a free East Coast Swing  Dance lesson and skyrocketted  from there. 

Some people need a little more reason to try East Coast Swing Dancing for the first time.  Before ordering your ZeDiamond Dance Method DVD, consider the following list of 10 reasons to love dancing. 

Ten Reasons to Love Ballroom Dance

“You’ve probably seen the very popular BBC television program Strictly Come Dancing, in the USA it was called Dancing with the Stars. If you’re wondering what all the fuss is about look no further because here’s a beginners guide to the top ten reasons to love ballroom dancing.

One – The Music

Ballroom and Latin dance music is quite simply fabulous and it makes you want to dance. I defy anyone to listen to ‘Shout It Feel It’ by the Count Basie Orchestra and not want to at least tap their feet! Dancing aside there has been a resurgence in interest in jazz and swing music, Michael Buble and Jamie Cullum being two modern exponents of the genre, and this has only helped dance to once again capture the public imagination.

Two – It’s Up Close and Personal

Before the recent interest in ballroom dancing people used to laugh when I told them I danced. They saw it as a strange thing to do. I never quite understood this as in the words of George Bernard Shaw dancing is the “vertical expression of a horizontal desire legalized by music”? Surely a reason to love ballroom dancing.

Three – Health Benefits

According to researchers social dancing provides the body with many health benefits. It may help reduce stress, increase energy, and improve strength, muscle tone, and co-ordination. Dancing can also burn as many calories as walking or riding a bike. One of the best aspects of ballroom dancing is the fun you can have while you’re doing something great for your body.

Four – The People You Meet

Like most walks of life dancing attracts all kinds of people but by far the majority of dancers are really nice people to know and great fun to be with.

Five – You Get to Dress Up

It’s fair to say that ballroom dancing went through a phase where the ladies wore some quite strange outfits. But today layers of petticoats and lace have given way to flowing gowns and glamorous figure hugging designer chic. Of course the men still wear their tail suits but even here heavy fabric has given way to much lighter and cooler alternatives. Socially of course tail suits are not worn but everybody loves the chance to dress up and wear nice clothes and what better occasion than a ballroom dance!

Six – You Can be Competitive

We humans are a competitive lot and dancing is no different. There is a vibrant and active competitive circuit at all levels of ballroom dancing from professional through to beginner. Even if stepping out with a number pinned to your back isn’t appealing you can still join in and shout your support from the wings. Contrary to popular belief competitive ballroom dancing isn’t a genteel pastime, quite the opposite and anyone attending a competition for the first time might be surprised by the experience. Competitions are definitely a reason to love ballroom dancing!

Seven – You Can Do It All Over The World

Ballroom dancing is popular the world over and if you travel you will find kindred spirits in all four corners of the globe. Some countries are more actively involved in dancing than others but you will seldom be far from a dance hall or studio wherever you may roam.

Eight – You Can Make People Envious

Nobody likes a show off but there’s a fine line between showing off and simply doing something you enjoy. There are many social situations where being able to dance is a positive boon and many people have taken up dancing after being at a wedding and watching people who can dance take to the floor wishing it was them. So another way of looking at this is if you dance at a social event you may well be encouraging others to take up dancing too!

Nine – It’s Hard

I play golf. Golf’s hard and week after week I go back to the course and week after week the course beats me. Dancing is hard too. Week after week I go to lessons and come away safe in the knowledge that there is still much to learn. But this isn’t a bad thing. Learning and perhaps mastering things that are hard is part of the human condition and dancing will present you with a lifetime of learning opportunities and the associated feeling you get when you master just one small part of it. Like golf, dancing is rewarding and fun because it’s hard.

Ten – It’s just fun!

What ever the level of dancing you achieve you will have fun. From the beginners taking to the floor for the first time, often with a terrified look on their face, through to seasoned professionals strutting their stuff at a dance demonstration dancing makes you feel alive and it makes you smile.”

Excerpt from Ten Reasons to Love Ballroom Dance by David A Robinson
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=David_A_Robinson  

It has been more than 10 years since I took that East Coast Swing Dance lesson and I am still benefiting from it.

Now, I have hundreds of friends across the country (including new ones in Asheville, NC) that I met on the dance floor.  I have the confidence to walk into a room of strangers and just start talking to people.  Twice, I have moved to areas where I knew few people and didn’t have a job, but I found the dance community and started building a new life.  I have greatly improved my mental and physical health from all the smiles and miles of dancing I have put on my feet.  My brain enjoys the challenge of learning new dance steps and dance moves, styling and technique.  Dancing is a whole body, whole mind, whole soul activity… an activity best shared with others.

Okay, I’m convinced.  How do I get started dancing?

For many people, the first dance they learn is the East Coast Swing.  Click here to learn a little about the history of East Coast Swing Dancing.  The East Coast Swing is a fun and lively dance that can be danced to a variety of music. Click here to watch a performance of East Coast Swing Dancing.

You can start dancing, quickly and easily right in your own home.  Just move the coffee table, grab a partner and pop in this DVD.  Take your first dance lesson with ZeDiamond Dance Method – Learn the East Coast Swing.  You will learn right along with a class of beginner dancers.  They ask questions, they laugh, they learn more than dance steps, they learn to dance with each other… just like you will. 

You need more reasons before you give East Coast Swing Dancing a try?  Click here to see if ballroom and swing dancing are right for you.

Once you learn ZeDiamond Dance Method, you will be able to learn other dances and useother dance systems as well.  Build up you confidence by learning at home with the DVD dance lessons.  Then go out and dance in nightclubs, go to ballroom and swing dances and continue to take local dance lessons.  You can always comeback and review what you have learned with ZeDiamond Dance Methodby popping in the DVD and dancing along at home.

See you out on the dance floor,

Amy Barnes

ZeDiamond Dance Method

When you just can’t dance one more…

I’ve been there.  I’ve been the person hiding in the back, strangely hoping and not hoping someone asks me to dance.  I’ve been too out of breath to speak, let alone dance another one.  I’ve been stepped on, had my arm wrenched, been hit by random free arms and I am now limping my way off the dance floor… just to meet the hopeful expression of a gentleman asking me, “Want-to?”

Declining a dance request is far more than, “just say no.”  You might be tired, hurt, thirsty or just not have another East Coast Swing left in you… But if all you say to the polite request to dance is, “No,” then you suddenly have a bigger problem than just sore toes.  Proper dance etiquette can help you politely decline a dance, while helping you keep or improve your chances for future dances.

Here is Paul McClure to help guide us through what could be a sticky situation at ballroom, swing or nightclub dance.

Declining A Dance

“When asked to dance, good manners dictate you say, “Yes,” at least once, unless the requesting party has overwhelming social disabilities.  Nothing shows class like a gracious acceptance of a dance from someone who may not appear to be exactly God’s gift.  Others notice.

However, if someone asks you to dance and you choose to decline, then do so without actually saying the word, “No,” and explain why you passed up the offer.  Suggestions include:

• “Let me sit this one out to catch my breath.”
• “Give me a few more dances to get up my courage.”
• “I haven’t learned that dance yet; how about a Rain Check till next time?”
• “I want to stay on the sidelines in hopes that Billy Bob will ask me to dance.”
• “I just told Billy Bob,’No,’ so I need to sit out a couple dances in order not to hurt his feelings.”

Also, when you decline a dance offer, introduce yourself and engage the petitioner in conversation for a short while so it won’t be evident to everybody in the room that you refused to dance.”

Excerpt from “Paul McClure’s Country Dance Etiquette”

Now that I have said, “No,” now what?

This is a rule of etiquette that I feel very strongly about.

Once you have turned down a dance request, you may not accept another until the current song has ended and a new song has started! 

I know what you are thinking… “But I want to dance to this song, just not with this person.  I would rather take the chance that someone better comes along and asks me.”  Well, you can do that, if you want to be known as a “dance snob.”  Though it may be fun to toy with the idea of, “I only dance with certain people,” it will quickly leave you few and far between in the partner department. 

Typically, the most popular dancers at the party are the ones who dance with the widest variety of partners.  People notice who you dance with and who you turn down. 

If there is an honest desire to dance a particular dance or song with a certain someone, ask them for that dance early, before the song is even played.  Later, when Bubba asks you to dance to your favorite swing song, you can politely say, “I’m sorry Bubba, Billy Bob already promised me this dance.  But please ask me again later.  I do want to dance with you tonight.”  Then you can run to Billy Bob guilt free (provided Billy Bob remembered that this is your song) and Bubba is not crushed.  In fact, Bubba is hunting for a new partner, and still looking forward to dancing with you down the road. 

This rule is so universal, I have been made aware of it in my travels, not just in Asheville, NC.  I have walked over to a person in the middle of a song and started chatting with them.  Then they tell me, “I would really love to dance with you, but I have already turned someone down for this song.  Can I have the next Swing with you?”  I just think to myself, “Score! One point to the polite dancer at my side.”  But I always answer, “Yes!”

But I don’t feel comfortable dancing yet…

Never fear, in time you will become more at ease on the dance floor.  Practicing at home with ZeDiamond Dance Method DVD’s will help you on your way to becoming a more confident and accomplished dancer.  It’s simple. Start with ZeDiamond Dance Method – Learn the East Coast Swing and soon you will be ready to learn how to dance other dances.

ZeDiamond Dance Method was designed not only to help you learn how to East Coast Swing, but to help you feel the rhythm of the music and connect with your dance partners.  With a little practice, you will be enjoying the music and your partner and not worrying about your feet.  Click here to watch a short video about ZeDiamond Dance Method

See you out on the dance floor,

Amy Barnes

ZeDiamond Dance Method 

The hunt is on!  We’re hunting for dance partners…

It is time, once again to talk dance etiquette.  Just learning how to dance lots of steps or having tons of swing dance moves isn’t enought to keep you swing dancing all night.  There is more to having lots of dance partners than just being the best east coast swing dancer in the room.  There is a proper way to ask someone for a dance, to decline and to accept a dance.  But we don’t need to worry about those things quite yet.  Because first we need to find someone we feel open to dancing with and hope they are open to dancing with us. 

Paul McClure is here to give us advise on scouting for dance partners.  The following is from his book, “Paul McClure’s Country Dance Etiquette”.  I know that it is written from a country dance hall perspective, but it holds true at swing parties, ballroom dances and at a nightclub dance as well.

Scouting

“When you’re ready to ask someone to dance, look for prospects flashing Wanna Dance Signals. Some are intentional and some are inadvertent, but all indicate readiness to dance.

HIS WANNA DANCE SIGNALS

1. Taking the free dance lesson
2. Removing hat, slicking down hair, putting hat back on
3. Spitting out tobacco plug
4. Munching popcorn in time to music
5. Popping Tic Tacs
6. Persuading friends to bet him that he won’t ask anybody to dance

 HER WANNA DANCE SIGNALS

1. Vigorous line dancing
2. Wearing shoes with straps or real western boots
3. Standing at an entry point to the dance floor
4. Sitting on an aisle stool or some other accessible place
5. Making eye contacting and smiling
6. Breathing

Look to those who are flashy, trashy or drunk for after-hours amusement, not dancing.  For dance partners, find people with open, sunny faces who smile a lot when they dance.  Drawing most attention are those who either dance with a variety of partners – probably the regulars – or ones who line dance enthusiastically – probably the newcomers.  Looking sad, preoccupied or desperate discourages others from attempting to penetrate your cloud.

Women can ask men to dance at a country dance hall.  Therefore, each individual chooses for himself or herself whether to watch or dance.  Cowboys relish both the notion that they might get asked to dance and the idea that the ladies can appreciate the courage it takes to ask.

If you wish to state your availability to dance, then ask an old coot to dance.  It will show you off to great advantage.  Plus, older partners usually have more refined people skills and more dance-focused social agenda.”

Excerpt from “Paul McClure’s Country Dance Etiquette”

I have seen the signs and I believe them to be true!

I have traveled all across this country and dance with people from every state and a few foreign countries too.  The Wanna Dance Signals are very universal.  They work just as well in Asheville, NC as they do Las Vegas, NV.  Ballroom dances, swing dances, night clubs and dance halls all have women and men who are there to dance… you just have to see the signals. 

Leaders, if she is breathing and at a dance, trust me, she is there to dance.  She really wants to dance if she sits near the edge of the dance floor or has learned to lead and is dancing with other women.  Even if all you know is how to East Coast Swing, an open partner will be happy to dance with you.

Too timid to consider dancing?

With ZeDiamond Dance Method Learn the East Coast Swing DVD’s, you learn at your own pace and where you feel most comfortable… at home in your kitchen or living room. Learn simple and easy East Coast Swing dance moves in your own home, before venturing out to a club, party, or dance.  Then you can take the free dance lesson at the ballroom dance or swing party with more confidence.  Once your confidence grows, you will be able to take what you have learned from ZeDiamond Dance Method and use it as a tool with while learning other dances.

If you ever find me at a dance in Asheville, NC or anywhere else in the world, please ask me to dance.  I promise I will say yes at least once.  Ballroom dance, swing dance, country western dance… it doesn’t matter – I”M HERE TO DANCE!   I WANNA DANCE!!! 

I look forward to seeing you out on the dance floor,

Amy Barnes

ZeDiamond Dance Method

We all think that we have a great sense of humor and rhythm…

Well, not all of us have a great sense of rhythm.  Luckily, learning straight timing and simple rhythm patterns can be learned.  If you learned to count as a child and can still count as an adult, then a sense of “straight time” can be taught to you.  It happens everyday… all around the the world.  And it can happen to you too!

Straight time… “Hip to be Square!” – Huey Lewis and the News

If you clap on the 2 and the 4 to music on the radio (okay, sometimes you may slip and clap on the 1 and 3), then you are a victim of straight time.  Much of the pop music on the radio today is written with some common similarities.  Music written in common time, has 4 beats in a measure.  If we lined the beats up in a pretty little row, they would be evenly spaced and very regular, just like a child counting…

1   2   3   4

When you snap, clap or bob you head to the music, you tend to do it on the 2 and the 4 and pause on the 1 and 3.

Sometimes, musicians like to use more than just the basic 4 counts in a measure.  They like to use the space between the counts as well. In the spaces, we will put an “and”. The ”ands” tend to be noted with a “+”.  So now our little row of regular spaced numbers looks like this.

1 + 2 + 3 + 4 +

Now there is a little more variety for the musicians.  While we still clap on the 2 and the 4, the musicians are allowed to use any of the 4 counts and the spaces between counts to express themselves.  Everything is still very regularly spaced and even in time.

“It Don’t Mean a Thing (If It Ain’t Got That Swing)” – Ivie Anderson

Swing timing does things a little differently than straight timing.  Swing and Jazz musicians like to use the space between the + and the count.  The space between the  + and the count is called “ah” or noted simply as “a”.  So now our pretty little row of numbers is not so balanced and square. 

 1  +a2  +a3  +a4

To really make it swing, the musicians take out the +’s and use the counts and the a’s.  Now things are really starting to swing.

1   a2   a3   a4

See how everything isn’t evenly spaced anymore.  With swing timing, musicians have even more interesting possibilities than in straight timing.  A popular swing or jazz rhythm you may have heard is “leg-a-lamb”.  You may hear this familiar pattern when a drummer taps a cymbal rhythmically through out a song.

1      a2           3      a4
leg-a-Lamb  leg-a-Lamb

What does this trip to “Mathmagic Land” have to do with dancing?

Music is very mathmatical.  It has order, time, patterns and a lot of fractions… 2 beats, 1 beat, half beats, quarter beats…. You may start to think that you need a degree in Applied Physics in order to ballroom dance or swing dance in time to the music.  Not so my friend.  There is an easier way than doing all this math in your head.

Boom-a-Boom  Boom-a-Boom Tah-Tee

If you have ever struggled to teach yourself to play a popular song on the piano, you know it is just easier to sing the words to the music on the radio.  So why worry about all the math and just sing this little song in your head instead? 

ZeDiamond Dance Method makes it easy to understand rhythm and timing for dances and music by doing what comes naturally.  You will forget about the math, and feel the music in your body while using Boom-a-Boom to help you keep time.  With ZeDiamond Dance Method you will learn how to  dance ballroom or swing steps, while learning proper rhythm and timing.  This will make you a better dancer, right from the start!

East Coast Swing is made up of triples and rock-steps.  “Boom-a-Boom” is the equivilant of “Leg-a-Lamb” and those are our triples.  “Tah-Tee” represents the rock steps.  To watch a video the shows the ZeDiamond Dance Method in action, click here.

ZeDiamond Dance Method is a revolutionary new way to learn to dance.  It was created by Deborah-Marie Diamond and Zeki Maviyildiz.  Both are drummers and dancers in Asheville, NC.  

Many drummers are taught rhythm patterns by using nonsense syllables to replace counts. Many times, these nonsense syllables are easier to say than the numbers and counts they represent.  Walk up to a drummer and say “leg-a-Lamb” and they will understand the rhythm pattern it represents. 

Deborah-Marie and Zeki are doing the same thing, but for East Coast Swing Dancers in the Asheville, NC area with Boom-a-Boom. Click here, and you will learn the history of ZeDiamond Dance Method and get the whole story.  Click here to watch Deborah-Marie and Zeki dance East Coast Swing together.

See you out on the dance floor,

Amy Barnes
ZeDiamond Dance Method

The countdown to Valentine’s Day has started!

That’s right boys and girls.  We have less than 30 days to figure out what we are going to do for this Valentine’s Day holiday.  Some of us will go out… Some of us will stay in… Some of us will be stuck working (just one of the perks of the service industry)… But all of us will be doing something to honor (or dishonor) this upcoming holiday.

My favorite way to celebrate any holiday is to go out and go dancing.  No big surprise there.  But what is surprising is the number of other people who celebrate through dance.  We dance at weddings.  We dance family reunions.  We dance at tailgate parties (don’t think for a second I didn’t see you be-bopping around to the radio with a chicken wing in one hand and a frosty beverage in the other).  We dance in our kitchens when no one is watching.  So why should Valentine’s Day be any different?  We are celebrating love… the hunt for love… the hope for love… and our desire to be loved.  We should be dancing with all the love and joy in our hearts.

Wait a second – Don’t tell me you don’t dance!

As children, we all dance.  I’ve got two nephews that can prove it.  At any given time, be it car, canoe or K-Mart, if they hear even the faintest music, they are dancing to it.  Mind you, they aren’t going to win “So You Think You Can Dance” anytime soon.  But they are having a great time and they don’t care who is watching them.

Something happens as we get older.  We get insecure and lose our confidence.  Rather than having fun and enjoying ourselves like children, we worry about looking silly and unattractive to others.  But some of us overcome this and still enjoy to dance.  Those who do not overcome these self-imposed setbacks, long to dance.

The perfect gift - A lifetime of dancing together.

Unlike a membership to the jelly of the month club, the gift of dance keeps on giving.  You get to spend the rest of your life enjoying the benefits of learning to dance…  Improved confidence, better connection with your partner, and the ability to make any night out, a romantic night out.  Plus, you get to really wow them at the next wedding or family reunion.  Click here to see if learning to ballroom or swing dance is right for you.

As always, I look forward to seeing you out on the dance floor,

Amy Barnes

ZeDiamond Dance Method

Amy and Jason Barnes cutting a rug

Home from a long weekend of swing dancing at “Worlds”.

 I was camped out at the Opryland Hotel from Thursday through Sunday.  I danced and danced and danced… and then danced some more.  Jason danced so much, his big toe became incredibly sore.  It was official, my swing was all swung out.  I left it all out there on the dance floor.

On Saturday night, I was getting lined-up with the rest of the competitors for the West Coast Swing Jack and Jill’s.  I was shocked at what I saw.  There was a complete lack of men a.k.a. LEADERS.

Where the ladies are…

So here I am in the line-up, 8 followers and 2 leaders.  I go into a group class, and I see 4 extra followers.  I know women who have learned to lead just because they are tired of sitting.  Men, if you can’t seem to find women at you local watering hole, try a local ballroom or swing dance.  You will meet all kinds of women!!!

One small dance step for man… one giant leap for mankind.

The first time trying something new is sometimes difficult.  The hardest part is getting started.  For would be dancers, it’s taking the first lesson.  My favorite dance students are beginners.  I love them and their energy.  But I am baffled by the amount of time that has passed between them wanting to learn to dance and making it to the first lesson.  It’s years!!!  It is not uncommon for someone to tell me they have wanted to learn to dance for 5, 10, or 15 years (or their wife or girlfriend has been talking about it for that long), but they never called a dance teacher or walked into a dance studio until just a few days ago. The first few steps just inside the dance hall’s door can be the hardest.  I understand, especially for men, just getting in the door is a giant leap.

What if you could walk into a ballroom or swing dance with a little more confidence in your step?

Sometimes, we fear only what we don’t know.  As a first time dancer, you may feel a little nervous because you think everyone at the dance knows more than you.  I get that, nobody like to be the low man on the totem poll.  So what if you could pick up a few moves before walking through the door?  What if you could dance your first dance in your kitchen or living room, rather than a dance studio.  What if you could learn enough East Coast Swing to dance all night long, without looking silly or unskilled to your partner? 

Check out how easy it can be to learn to learn how to East Coast Swing Dance!

Visit the ZeDiamond Dance Method website to see just how easy it can be.  There you can watch a video and check out how it works.  ZeDiamond Dance Method in a new way to learn to dance.  You will also find easy to follow instructional DVD’s for learning how to East Coast Swing Dance.  Give them a try.  You will be up and dancing and feeling more comfortable moving with the music by the end of this 2 DVD set.

Dancing with men.

I love dancing with men.  Skill level is not so important.  I love dancing with young men, old men, men in street shoes, men in jeans… I even once danced in a swing competition with a man who danced in black socks – NO SHOES!  Men, I know I’m not the only women who feels this way.  We need you men… at every dance, at every group dance class, at every swing dance party.  My tired, worn-out, danced himself into a limp, husband needs you too.  Please come take some of the followers off his hands so he can sit down once in awhile. Followers all over the world need you.  So please, take the first dance steps and learn how to dance with us.

Amy Barnes

ZeDiamond Dance Method